i got complicated feelings. First, i feel so pissed with my bro. When i fall asleep just now, dear called. He asked dear to called my hp. Before hanging up, Dear asked my bro to convey to me that he called. When i wake up, my stupid bro didn't tell me anything. I didn't go and see my hp either cos it didn't ring or smth. now, dear is so angry with me. He thinks that i dun wan to answer and call him back. I have no intention in doing tt. Why should i do tt? I miss him so much and i cant possibly want to do tt rite? "Dear, i'm so sorry k? dun be mad pls."

Tml i got this oral com ICA and i'm not prepared for anything. i really dunnoe wad to talk abt. maybe i shld just go there and shoot bird la. Hope everything goes fine tml.

We are having the grand finale and jam n hop tml. Intially, i'm so excited but i dunnoe why the excitement fade. I'm stressing abt wad to wear. thinking shld i leave at nine with dear. shall see how things go tml.

Sometimes in sch, i feel quite lost form. i dunnoe why. i just feel that i am not my usual self. not the "siao chao bo" i used to be, the cheeky girl in my girl's click, the attitude problem girl and everything. I'm so quiet in sch la. Xinyi find it weird too. All my friends think tt i'm those guai guai quiet quiet girl lo. i told xinyi and she is like " huh? really?". ya. i know it is a very unbelievable news for my old friends. Anyway, it might a good thing. A new beginning for me. Maybe now i can be the guai guai girl i always wanted to be. My class of friends are cool and all. We mostly hang out in a big group. However, i always have the urge of leaving the class and look for my old friends. At least i feel so usual with them. Not tt i am not comfortable. Haiz. it is just difficult to explain. Soulmates are really hard to find. Hope i can find one in poly. A true one. Someone who we can really click well. able to understand me well and vise versa.

no matter i can find or not, i still got dear. he is my everything. Although sometimes he dun understand how i feels, at least i got his ears. I love him loads. Dear, if u are reading this, Hope u know how much i love and miss u every single minute. also, how much i need u and how important u are to me.
I LOVE YOU LOADS LOADS!!!